| Dear Yeshiva Family:
In this week's parshah, Yosef is sent by his father Yaakov to find his brothers, who were grazing their livestock away from home, and report on them. Yosef started looking for his brothers in the area that they ostensibly were in, and chanced upon 'a man', who was really a malach in disguise. The pasuk (37:15) reads "A man discovered him…the man asked him, saying, what do you seek?" The man then guides Yosef to Dosan, where his brothers currently were located.
Many meforshim question the wording of the pasuk, which seemingly has an extra word, "saying." The pasuk should merely have said "the man asked him 'What do you seek'"? Why the extra word "the man asked him 'saying'"?
The Kotzker Rebbe (as does the Lev Simcha and Chiddushei HaRim) shares an incredibly important insight which can help one get through hard times. The Malach was actually giving a message to Yosef. The Malach foresaw that Yosef was about to embark on the most difficult years of his life. He is about to be thrown into a pit and almost killed by his brothers before he's sold into slavery, then tempted by the wife of Potifar and, after refusing her advances, he is forced to spend 12 years in jail. He then will have to continue the separation from his father, as Egypt goes through its seven years of plenty, and then will have to play the whole charade with the brothers that we will see in the upcoming parshiyos. Therefore, the Malach was telling him the way to get through hard times is to keep one's eye on the goal, to keep saying to yourself, "What do you really want?" This extra word "saying" is meant for Yosef himself. Yosef, if you want to survive the turbulence of life, then you have to keep repeating to yourself, "what do I really want, what are my goals?" The clarity achieved through this process will get you through the challenging moments in life. Many times, things start to go rough for a person, but if a person remembers that he has a goal and he is doing things for a purpose, then he will not be deterred by things not working out perfectly.
Executive coaches will tell you that in our busy lives at times we get caught up by side projects that can distract us from our main goals and therefore we must make a conscious effort to remain goal focused. But the truth is, that sometimes we don't meet our goals, and then what happens to our personal selves? Sometimes, in business or in our relationships, we set a specific goal and it doesn't work out, and we feel crushed. A person could have invested his life; his time, money, effort and blood only to have his dream crumble in front of him.
The important insight the angel was telling Yosef was to always remember the 'bottom line goal'. Yosef had a goal, to go get information his father wanted and report back. Instead, he was sold to Egypt. He wanted to be a good slave there, but things didn't work out and he ended up in jail! His short-term goals didn't work out the way he wanted but that didn't break him. This is because he kept his eye on the bigger, overriding goal.
What is the ultimate purpose of being on this planet? We have many goals that we attempt to achieve, but our main goal is to do Hashem's will. If one keeps his eye on the main goal, serving Hashem, then nothing can deter him. If one, chas v'shalom, ends up in jail, like Yosef, then he can now serve Hashem in this new station. Even though his original goals were not to be there, one must just keep his eye on the overall goal.
This is done by focusing on one's main goals in life, and not letting other people deter him. How am I doing in Hashem's eyes, in my family's eyes, and if those get checks, one should feel satisfied.
One of the most liberating feelings one can inculcate in himself is the ability to direct his actions to do what is right and not doing things for other people.
Earlier this year, House Democrats grilled former special counsel John Durham about his lengthy report that criticized the FBI for its investigation into the Trump campaign's relationship with Russia during the 2016 election in a series of heated exchanges. Rep. Steve Cohen, D-Tenn., insisted that Durham's "reputation will be damaged" as he accused him of running a biased investigation. Durham fired back: "My concern about my reputation is with the people who I respect, my family, and my Lord, and I'm perfectly comfortable with my reputation with them, sir."
This is called keeping one's priorities straight. Even if it is true that his reputation would be damaged, nevertheless as long as he knows he is doing what is right and his Lord and family would be happy with him, he is fine. Having one's reputation damaged can be very challenging, but the main goal is being a good person in Hashem's eyes. Then, even if things don't work out, it will not bother him. And a person must remember that even if he made mistakes, there is always teshuva, which will help one's reputation with Hashem, where it matters most.
Closing one's eyes daily and focusing on the larger goals in one's life – priority to Hashem, to family, to the community, will keep a person balanced and stable as he focuses his efforts on the things that really count.
May Hashem grant us all with the inner serenity one gets when he knows he is doing the right thing, and guide all of us in our journey down the right path!
Rabbi Moshe Revah Rosh HaYeshiva, HTC - Beis HaMidrash LaTorah moshe.revah@htc.edu | 
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