| "And Aharon's sons, Nadav and Avihu, each took his fire-pan…"
(Vayikra 10:1)
A deeply tragic episode. Two of the holiest individuals—Nadav and Avihu, the sons of Aharon HaKohen, exalted servants of HaShem—fell in such a way that led to their untimely passing. Yet, in that very moment, their sanctity was revealed in full. Their bodies remained completely intact, a sign of their immense spiritual stature.
What was their mistake?
Our Sages teach that they were not married. They believed that the ultimate service of HaShem meant remaining apart from worldly matters—specifically, avoiding marriage—so they could remain constantly attached to HaShem in total spiritual separation.
Reb Noson, in Hilchos Tefilas Arvis, teaches a powerful insight. The holiest day of the year is Yom Kippur—a day of complete separation from all physical desires. No eating or drinking, and no involvement in procreation. A day that mirrors the reality of the World to Come, where the soul alone connects to HaShem in purity.
And yet—Yom Kippur is only complete if it is preceded by the preparations of Erev Yom Kippur. On that day, we are commanded to eat and drink and engage with the world. If a person avoids this physical preparation, thinking he's too spiritual for it, then even his Yom Kippur is lacking. Because the wholeness of Yom Kippur depends on how we engage with this world beforehand.
We were not created to live as angels.
This is a fundamental truth we must internalize. HaShem put us in a world of food and drink, of marriage and family life, with all the complexities and challenges that come along with them. Our task is not to escape these things, but rather to bring our connection to HaShem into them.
When we live this way—struggling through our human condition, rising and falling and rising again—we're fulfilling the true purpose of life. And then, once a year, on Yom Kippur, we get a taste of what it's like to live as an angel, as someone already in the World to Come.
But for the rest of the year, our avodah is to confront life head-on. To deal with our desires. To wrestle with reality. It's okay not to be perfect. We're not supposed to be angels.
Sadly, in our generation, some people avoid marriage for the opposite reason. Not because they seek spiritual elevation, but because they live in the illusion that staying single will bring them lasting happiness. But eventually, reality sets in—and sometimes, that realization comes too late.
We must remember that we were brought into this world as human beings, not angels. And our role is to grow step by step—especially through the holy bond of marriage—until we reach the end of our days, and then, IY"H, we will truly enter the World to Come.
Fortunate are we!
Shabbat Shalom
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